I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
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