I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Randomize