can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.