Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Even my vagina gasped.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy