oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
