actually, I'm a sock model
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize