well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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