Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize