Plan B is the new Plan A
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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