he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize