Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
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I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
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You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize