i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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