I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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