I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize