I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
Did I show you my penis last night?
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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