It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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