No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
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