Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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