But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
My feet surprised me
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
