She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
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He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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