So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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