I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
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