Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
