So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
