I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
You're a waste of cheezeits
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
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