just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
He keeps bees of course he's weird
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
