she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize