Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Randomize
