Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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