We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Randomize