im gay
i know
yea but for you.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
