Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Randomize
