i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Randomize
