My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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