with your own penis?
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize