i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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