i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
