Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Randomize
