That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize