fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
i dont even know how to be here
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Randomize
