I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
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