DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
