I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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