i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
