is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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