I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
