I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Randomize