Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
