Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(386): View more from Florida

You going to midnight mass? we need a dd

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(615): View more from Tennessee

Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline

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(585): View more from New York

He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.

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(815): View more from Illinois

I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.

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21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Read it at the TFLN blog
(304): View more from West Virginia

they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.

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(305): View more from Florida

Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.

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(626): View more from California

Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.

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(407): View more from Florida

Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...

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(240): View more from Maryland

Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check

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