Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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