So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
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