We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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